What I want for Christmas.
So, what does everyone want for Christmas? Come on, you can tell me. Imagine for a moment that I am Santa Claus and that you are, once again, eight years old -- If you are eight or less and reading this, I am very proud of you. Stick with me, the stories will start to make sense when you hit 25 -- Imagine you are eight and telling someone what you want for Christmas. Climb up onto your keyboard and whisper into your monitor. Or, you could just type. That might be more effective.
It will be fun, I promise. Just like when you were little without having to wait in a long line still bundled in your winter coat with your hat and mittens. The too-loud holiday songs blasting in your ears, listening to the screaming kid in front of you cry about how he doesn't want to see Santa all the while having to go to the bathroom, but not wanting to loose your good place in line. Hoping against hope that your eight year old bladder can withstand the pressure of the quart-sized glass of fruit punch you drank before your parents dropped you off.
Wow, maybe this won't be fun. I know, I will start and then you won't have to be scared.
This year I asked for a copy of Bill Bryson's "Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid". Don't ask me what it is about, I just like the name of it and I historically enjoy Bryson's books. Have I mentioned that he is tall? If I had to guess, I would imagine it has something to do with the life and times of some kid who may, or may not, have anything to do with Thunderbolts. This kid might be Bryson, I will let you know in a few weeks.
Along with the book, I asked for a new CD. Not just any CD, a boxed set. The Tom Waits boxed set. I believe it is called "Orphans". I like Tom Waits. He makes me feel good about myself. For those of you not familiar with Tom Waits, he is kinda bluesy. Not in a Muddy Waters/B.B. King sort of way, more in a "I am so depressed I could fill the tub with Whiskey, climb in and not come out" sort of way. He writes and sings songs that would just about make you want to drink yourself to death. Plus his voice lets me believe I can become a singer someday. So that makes him a blues man in my eyes. I don't know what that says about me, but I like the man and I likes his work. (Yes, I know I said "likes".)
I also asked for some new pajamas, a new bag to cart my work junk around in, a solid gold Harley with machine guns on the front, (You never know if you don't ask) Spiderman Under Roos, and the other typical things a person is supposed to ask for.
Okay, your turn. What did you ask for? Or, what are you looking forward to?
Personally, I am looking forward to a gallon of eggnog spiked with spiced pumpkin moonshine. (I know a guy.) That should be enough to help me make it through the holidays, or it will put me in an alcohol/fat coma until it is all over and January fades in.
If anyone is looking for a few suggestions about good holiday gifts, I can recommend a couple things. In DVD land, any male around 30 would should own at least one of these films; "Deliverance". I know what you are thinking, The Ned Beatty scene right? Come on, it was directed by John Boorman, Uncle Burt was young, handsome and not a joke yet, it is a perfect, manly, buddy film. Wouldn't you shoot a guy who was about to do that to your friend?
"Flash Gordon". Not the old timey one your dad made you watch on television. I am talking about the ultra cheesed out 1980 version with Max von Sydow as Ming. Come on, Queen did the soundtrack! As a side note, I keep the soundtrack in my car and sometimes I pop it in when I am zipping through traffic. It just rocks!
Last one:
"Full Metal Jacket" Some might tell you that "Apocalypse Now" is the superior film, but I will take R. Lee Ermey as Sgt. Hartman over Robert Duvall as Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore any day. If I were in a scrape, I would want Hartman on my side, sure Kilgore can surf, but no one can yell, scream and curse like Ermey. All it would take is him asking what my name was to make me glad I asked Santa for those new Spiderman Under Roos.
I hope you all get something good this year and stick around long enough for me to get to some event news.
It will be fun, I promise. Just like when you were little without having to wait in a long line still bundled in your winter coat with your hat and mittens. The too-loud holiday songs blasting in your ears, listening to the screaming kid in front of you cry about how he doesn't want to see Santa all the while having to go to the bathroom, but not wanting to loose your good place in line. Hoping against hope that your eight year old bladder can withstand the pressure of the quart-sized glass of fruit punch you drank before your parents dropped you off.
Wow, maybe this won't be fun. I know, I will start and then you won't have to be scared.
This year I asked for a copy of Bill Bryson's "Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid". Don't ask me what it is about, I just like the name of it and I historically enjoy Bryson's books. Have I mentioned that he is tall? If I had to guess, I would imagine it has something to do with the life and times of some kid who may, or may not, have anything to do with Thunderbolts. This kid might be Bryson, I will let you know in a few weeks.Along with the book, I asked for a new CD. Not just any CD, a boxed set. The Tom Waits boxed set. I believe it is called "Orphans". I like Tom Waits. He makes me feel good about myself. For those of you not familiar with Tom Waits, he is kinda bluesy. Not in a Muddy Waters/B.B. King sort of way, more in a "I am so depressed I could fill the tub with Whiskey, climb in and not come out" sort of way. He writes and sings songs that would just about make you want to drink yourself to death. Plus his voice lets me believe I can become a singer someday. So that makes him a blues man in my eyes. I don't know what that says about me, but I like the man and I likes his work. (Yes, I know I said "likes".)I also asked for some new pajamas, a new bag to cart my work junk around in, a solid gold Harley with machine guns on the front, (You never know if you don't ask) Spiderman Under Roos, and the other typical things a person is supposed to ask for.
Okay, your turn. What did you ask for? Or, what are you looking forward to?
Personally, I am looking forward to a gallon of eggnog spiked with spiced pumpkin moonshine. (I know a guy.) That should be enough to help me make it through the holidays, or it will put me in an alcohol/fat coma until it is all over and January fades in.
If anyone is looking for a few suggestions about good holiday gifts, I can recommend a couple things. In DVD land, any male around 30 would should own at least one of these films; "Deliverance". I know what you are thinking, The Ned Beatty scene right? Come on, it was directed by John Boorman, Uncle Burt was young, handsome and not a joke yet, it is a perfect, manly, buddy film. Wouldn't you shoot a guy who was about to do that to your friend?"Flash Gordon". Not the old timey one your dad made you watch on television. I am talking about the ultra cheesed out 1980 version with Max von Sydow as Ming. Come on, Queen did the soundtrack! As a side note, I keep the soundtrack in my car and sometimes I pop it in when I am zipping through traffic. It just rocks!Last one:
"Full Metal Jacket" Some might tell you that "Apocalypse Now" is the superior film, but I will take R. Lee Ermey as Sgt. Hartman over Robert Duvall as Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore any day. If I were in a scrape, I would want Hartman on my side, sure Kilgore can surf, but no one can yell, scream and curse like Ermey. All it would take is him asking what my name was to make me glad I asked Santa for those new Spiderman Under Roos.I hope you all get something good this year and stick around long enough for me to get to some event news.
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