I have mentioned where I grew up once before haven't I? I swear I have. In fact, I know I did because I have the power of hindsight and the ability to look back through the blogs I have posted. I know I said it, just stick with me. When I was a kid, we used to get snow. Now I am not talking about snow like here in DC, where 2000 flakes fall from the sky and the entire population starts panic-buying milk and duct tape, then cuts out of work early to flee the city in droves. I am talking about feet and feet of heavy, wet, sticky snow followed by cold so fast, deep and intense that the tree sap freezes and causes the trees to explode. I remember one year when it was so cold, my father had to light a small fire under my mother's car so it would start.

Right, now you are thinking, "Sure, and it was SO cold the flames froze. Tell us another about Paul Bunyan and his blue ox." But the fire event was real. What I am trying to say is that I grew up with snow. I am not unfamiliar with the concept of inclement weather. No offense to anyone who grew up here or lives outside of the District. I read in the paper that there were 200 accidents in the district the last time we had a snow storm. There were 20 in Montgomery County. That tells me that country folk drive better than city folk. It could be the fact that all the people in DC came from somewhere that has never heard of snow, let alone seen it or tried to drive in it.

What does all this ranting about snow and cold have to do with events? Funny you should ask. One of the things people forget to do while they are in full panic and grabbing toilet paper off the shelves like sharks at dinnertime, they forget to go to book events where I have placed a very nice author. The author braved the elements, the staff at the store braved the elements, but when the crazed panic of harsh weather grips the nation, a book event slips the customer's mind. You might think they would enjoy something to do while they are stuck at home and not going to work or school. Sometimes the power does fail in this area when the weather goes south and Tivo doesn't really work without power. If only those people had a good book to read while they were holed up in the dark, wrapped in toilet paper.

I keep my fingers crossed that the snow never comes because nothing will kill an event faster than bad weather. I think I might start taping all book events and simulcasting them on our website for a small fee. That way, if people were trapped in their homes by the 2 cm of snow that fell from the sky on Friday night, they could still see and hear what went on at Dupont, Lansburgh and Crystal City. Right now I don't have the ability to be in three places at once and film all three events, perhaps in the future I will gain these abilities.

For those of you who are living in the present and can brave the weather, please allow me to regale you with what is going on. Over in Crystal City, Aviva Goldfarb will be dishing out samples of goodies she made from her book at lunch time (12-1pm). Six O'Clock Scramble is the book's title for those of you keeping track. She and I met for the first time back in November at the University Club book fair. We talked about food and books. Good common ground for a Bookstore Event Coordinator and a Cookbook Author. Not only is Aviva an author, chef and mother of two, she is very friendly, drop-dead gorgeous and has a link to Share Our Strength on her website. SOS is a great association for all you foodies to get involved in. Google it and Aviva. I will wait...

Okay. Welcome back.

Friday night is going to be night of rocking festivities given the fact that it is Charles Darwin's Birthday! In honor of that fact, Edward Humes is going to be in our Lansburgh store reading from his new book "Monkey Girl". Why would I bring an author to a store on Darwin's birthday? Ah, because Ed's book touches on the touchiest of touchy subjects, the greatest of great dividers, that which shall not be named in any school system without some poor kid getting converted to home schoolin', Evolution! I love anything that people have to fight about. I also enjoy the idea that someone came up with the term "Intelligent Design", then can't have an intelligent discussion about it. Personally, I struggle to believe that we came from apes. Apes don't destroy everything around them and then point the finger at someone else. --Wait a second. I remember reading something recently about Koko (the sign language gorilla with the orange kitty), she had a bad day and tore her sink off the wall. When her trainer person asked her about it, she blamed it on the cat. The cat ripped the sink out of the wall. She lied. So maybe we are descended from apes. It would explain why I have to shave twice a day.

Our other event going on Friday night is a tag team event. Ed Schwarzchild, and his girlfriend Elisa Albert are going to be in Dupont reading from their books. How cool is it they are both writers and touring together. This will either cement their relationship or tear it to shreds. Ed is reading from his book "Responsible Men" and Elisa will read from her collected stories, "How This Night is Different". I asked them at the outset if they were okay to share the stage even though the concepts of the books are very different. Ed has assured me they can be friends and play nice while they are "working". We shall see, won't we?

I am torn between where I will be. When I started typing this, I had it down in my head where I was going, but after re-reading, I might have to drive around a bit. I am for sure going to see/chat with Aviva again. I have to ask if she tried my recipe for a rockin' PBJ I told her about last time we talked. As for the evening? I am on the fence. I like to support new authors; I like a good controversy. Tough choices. Good thing I live in a country where I am given the right to do just that: Choose. Wish me luck in my choice and I will wish you luck in yours. Even if my choice is different that yours.

Editor's Notes: The 200 accidents in the district might be wrong. This number was questioned by Chris Callahan, our pop music buyer and long-time DC resident. He knows the roads and is probably right.

No mention was made in this blog of the most frightening of all road hazard, "Black Ice", which is ten-times more dangerous than regular ice because it wears puffy jackets, backwards ball-caps and might call you "Dawg". Ice is Ice. It is whatever color it sits upon. Calling Ice a color is like saying, blue water has more fish than green water. It is all water and it is all clear. The color is only a reflection. Join with me and end Ice-ism. Call it what it is and stop making 'Black' a negative.

The 16th is Charles Darwin's Birthday. It is known as Darwin Day by those in the loop and will soon be a holiday the same time we clone a human and win the war on terror. Has anyone been to the National Portrait gallery in London? There is a wall of busts there and Darwin's is the smallest one. Discuss among yourselves.

Aviva Goldfarb is a fox and if she is married I hope her husband doesn't punch me in the nose. The Blogger will share his PBJ recipe if you email him and ask. It really is good.